Beauty and the Geek 5 Episode 1

In an effort to make this a ridiculously crazy reality TV night (Fox has American Idol 7, NBC has The Biggest Loser: Couples, and CBS has Big Brother 9… and if you explore further, you’ll find Reality Chat on TV Guide, America’s Next Top Model on VH1, High School Reunion on TV Land, True Life on MTV, Deal or No Deal on CNBC, America’s Funniest Home Videos on ABC Family, and Real Housewives on Bravo), The CW is jumping into the ring with the premiere of Beauty and the Geek 5. Check out the Beauty and the Geek 5 cast, which unlike last season does not include a male beauty and female geek since nobody liked that twist the first time.

This season, it’s not beauty and the geek. It’s beauty vs. the geek. What the point of that is I’m not real clear.

Greg is a gay geek (the clothing designer part in his bio gave that away). Joe tells us sex is overrated. Tommy collects sweater vests. Jim looks like he just stepped off a VW bus in the 70s.

Amber says she’s a 20. Someone slap her. Tara hits up daddy for money whenever she needs it. Kristina isn’t stupid… she just… doesn’t know stuff. Tiffany says her IQ is a little below average, probably around 200.

Amber lets Greg sleep in her room. All of the girls immediately like him. He’s afraid he doesn’t fit in with either group.

The girls get together to plot strategy. Amber doesn’t want to hear anything about it, choosing instead to get in her bathing suit and sit on Joe’s lap. She makes an alliance with him, even if she can’t remember his name afterward.

The challenge is about numbers. It’s about getting phone numbers from strangers. They’ll go to a Hollywood club full of hot guys and girls. To level the playing field, the girls are getting a makeunder, from fat to bad skin to bad clothes. Even still, it’s unfair because the girls may not be as pretty as usual, but they’ve got a lot more self confidence and people skills.

The task is sped through, with no clear indication of who did how well, just that everybody struggled to an extent. Mike will call all the numbers and make sure they’re actually real.

The real drama begins after the challenge. Randi and Amber try to prove they’re the most obnoxious of the group, getting into a screaming match. It’s a pretty close race.

The beauties won the challenge. Wow. Shocker. I hope all the challenges aren’t this lopsided, but I don’t see how they can make them much fairer. As with last year’s twist, it’s obvious from the first night it’s a stupid idea.

Having won the challenge, the girls will have to send 5 geeks to the elimination room. They want to come up with the four guys who they most don’t want to see have a chance of going home. Since he has a girlfriend already, Chris is sent to the elimination room. Tommy is as well, which doesn’t surprise me because he looks like the guy who’s the ringer of the group. Jonathan and Joe are more social than the others. John is the last one sent to the elimination room. That leaves Greg, Jason, Jim, and Matt as safe.

They’ll all get questions. The first person to answer right stays. If they answer wrong, they’re out. Tommy is safe from elimination, having correctly recalled a girl’s phone number from a video clue. Chris knows how to speak like he’s on AOL, saving himself. Jonathan is the next one safe. Joe saves himself by knowing that you can get someone’s attention with your eyebrows. John has been eliminated. Lame quiz format accompanies the lame twist.

Stay tuned to Beauty and the Geek 5 episode 2, which airs Tuesday at 8/7c on The CW.

Leave a Reply