The Amazing Race 18 Winners

Kent & Vyxsin bickered their way to elimination in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 10.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Flight Time & Big Easy – 7:12AM
Second: Kisha & Jen – 7:15AM
Third: Gary & Mallory – 7:18AM
Fourth: Zev & Justin – 7:31AM

Flight Time & Big Easy hope they don’t screw up again and come in fourth. Kisha & Jen are the only team remaining that has not won a leg. They, too, placed fourth in their last season. Zev & Justin, who have placed first four times this year, were eliminated early based on the loss of their passports, so whatever happens, they’re already well ahead of their prior game.

Heading out of the cold, teams will now fly to the beaches of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. I expected everybody to be on the same flight, but there are two flights, 10 hours apart. The Globetrotters see the other teams getting really bad flights. For the first time this race, the let’s play nice nonsense has died. They pretend they don’t know anything. Their bad acting, however, gives away that Kisha & Jen and Gary & Mallory are about to make a stupid mistake. With that, everybody is indeed on the same flight.

Everybody seems to be under the impression they speak Spanish in Brazil. Close enough I guess.

Getting a slow cab driver puts the Globetrotters half an hour behind as they wait for the next tram.

The road block is to learn and dance the samba and lead their samba troupe on a parade through the streets.

Road block (in order of arrival): Zev, Mallory, Kisha, Big Easy

Zev can’t dance, but he’s stuck doing the road block because he’s only done 4 of them so far (a rule I’m complete fine with because there have been teams who have done quite well on the back of one team member carrying somebody else who was completely useless), though I doubt Justin would be much better anyway. Mallory, however, has danced all her life. Mallory’s just fine on her first try, but this could take Zev a while. His second attempt is no good, as Kisha also passes on her first try. This is enough for the Globetrotters to catch up. Zev finally awkwardly makes his way through. Then, in spite of enjoying dancing, Big Easy is rejected on his first try, but his second attempt is good.

From there, teams go to a salon in Copacabana, where all team members must endure a 15 minute Brazilian waxing session. Bad news for Zev & Justin, two guys who have hair all over their bodies.

The detour is a choice between on the rocks or on the beach. In on the rocks, they must learn to make the most popular drink in Brazil, the caipirinha (100 times). In on the beach, they will have to choose an umbrella with bikini tops and get people to change into and model them, enough to earn 100 reals (about $60). The drinks task seems less risky than relying on sales ability.

On the rocks: Gary & Mallory, Kisha & Jen, Flight Time & Big Easy, Zev & Justin (switched from on the beach)

Having chose a bad detour where nobody was willing to get changed in front of them, Zev & Justin are in big trouble and hoping for a miracle that won’t come.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is the Museum of Contemporary Art.

First: Gary & Mallory (win a cruise along the Mediterranean)
Second: Kisha & Jen
Third: Flight Time & Big Easy
Eliminated: Zev & Justin

With a bad run of luck this leg, Zev & Justin, who have performed well this season for the most part, have been eliminated.

Time for hour two. Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Gary & Mallory – 8:54AM
Second: Kisha & Jen – 9:05AM
Third: Flight Time & Big Easy – 9:29AM

The final destination city is more than 4000 miles away in Miami, Florida. All teams are on the same flight. After the rush out of the airport, the bad news for Gary & Mallory is that they get a slow cab driver who doesn’t know where he’s going. His idea of calling someone is to look it up on the Internet (while he’s driving). He finally agrees to pull over to let them ask for help.

The road block at the marina is to climb on a forklift, learn how to operate it, and transport a boat to the storage rack without destroying anything. The task seems to be simple enough.

Road block (in order of arrival): Kisha, Flight Time, Gary

The next stop is Key Largo. The second road block is to search the undersea world in a personal submarine to find a clue in a treasure chest. Whoever didn’t do the last road block has to do this one. Searching tasks come down to dumb luck more often than not, but this one doesn’t seem too terribly difficult.

Road block 2 (in order of arrival): Big Easy, Jen, Mallory

The next throughly cryptic clue tells them to go near the mile marker of 4 subtracted from 33. The Globetrotters decide to stop for directions. Kisha & Jen’s cab driver sees them asking, but they don’t want to stop. This pays off and allows them to take the lead by a couple of minutes.

Upon arrival, they must walk across the ocean and find the tallest tree on Horseshoe Island. Then they’ll take a speedboat back to the marina and then travel to Galway Bay Mobile Home Park, a 55+ trailer community. Their task will be to hook a small trailer to the local utilities and set up a trailerhood based on the pictures in a brochure. This seems simple enough until the winds start blowing everything away. The leading teams are still within spitting distance of each other, as the third place team has clearly fallen out of this, but for the first time since the plane they finally see the other teams. Kisha & Jen and Flight Time & Big Easy both get rejected on their first attempt. Incorrect for a second time, the girls realize the only problem is they forgot to put something on the table. With that, their next attempt is correct. The Globetrotters are rejected for a second time, so they go look at what Kisha & Jen did, and they realize their issue is also the table being set incorrectly. Their third attempt is good. Gary & Mallory are correct on what appears to be their first try.

They will now travel to the Seven Mile Bridge and cross the bridge by tricycle. I don’t think these were built with two 6+ foot tall men in mind, or Kisha for that matter. On this ride, the Globetrotters realize there’s no way they’re going to be able to catch up.

The Amazing Race 18 winners are Kisha & Jen. Anticlimactic. The team that’s only won one leg in two seasons ends up winning the whole show, while the two better teams get left behind.

Based on the ratings, it’s safe to assume The Amazing Race will be back for season 19. Please, no more teams that know each other. Nobody was in it to win it, instead just stopping to help each other on tasks designed to be skipped by anybody who felt like skipping them once one team had the answer.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 10

Jet & Cord were eliminated in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 9 following a boringly predictable turn of events in which only one or two teams actually got the road block answer then proceeded to share with everybody else, leaving only the cowboys having to actually work to get it right.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Zev & Justin – 6:54AM
Second: Kisha & Jen – 7:02AM
Third: Kent & Vyxsin – 8:00AM
Fourth: Gary & Mallory – 8:18AM
Fifth: Flight Time & Big Easy – 8:43AM

With teams being given $1 for this leg of the race, the first stop is the Air Rescue Helicopter Port, with a departure to “the unknown”. Helicopters will take off at 9:15 and will depart in 5 minute intervals. It’s first come, first served. It seems that it will be based on departure order, but Kent & Vyxsin have difficulty getting a cab willing to stop for pink/gothic anime characters, so they end up in fourth.

The detour on the Matterhorn is a choice between search or rescue. In search, they will use an avalanche beacon to locate a training dummy on the glacier. In rescue, one team member has to rapel to rescue a mountaineer, then the other will bring them back to the surface using a pulley system. Typically, search and dig is not a good choice.

Search: Zev & Justin, Gary & Mallory
Rescue: Kisha & Jen, Kent & Vyxsin, Flight Time & Big Easy

The rescue task has the potential to be scary, but that aside, it looks pretty simple and straightforward.

The teams doing that task finish first. Zev & Justin are getting nowhere fast. Gary & Mallory are having more luck, although their problem is they’ve ripped the legs off their dummy. After digging the legs out, they leave Zev & Justin behind in the snow.

From there, they will take a helicopter to a ski resort and take a train back to Zermatt and then to Le Petit Cervin. The first train departs at 11:08, which should be sufficient time to complete a detour. With Zev & Justin still digging, they’re going to be left behind the other four teams by at least 25 minutes.

The road block is to create a Travelocity roaming gnome out of chocolate. Bonus points for creative use of product placement.

Road block (in order of arrival): Vyxsin, Flight Time, Mallory, Jen, Zev

This interesting but poorly thought out road block leads to issues with which chocolate belongs to whom. The teams are putting partially finished molds into the freezer, but there is no system to mark whose each one is. Flight Time’s is missing, so he’ll use the random one he finds instead. Arguing ensues between the Globetrotters and Kent & Vyxsin.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is a Swiss cabin. As usual, we already know which team will place last. Ah, but for a change, there’s some real non-manufactured drama. The clue tells them to make their way on foot. Kent & Vyxsin stand there wondering whether they can run there. They should have done so, rather than taking a cab. Even with the cab, they manage to drop from first to third by the time they arrive. However, they have incurred a 30 minute penalty. This gives them half an hour to bicker. He doesn’t know how they missed it. What he does know is she read it first. He says that, with her attitude, he hopes they’re going home. Me, too.

First: Flight Time & Big Easy (win a trip to Cook Islands)
Second: Kisha & Jen
Third: Gary & Mallory
Fourth: Zev & Justin
Eliminated: Kent & Vyxsin

Following their penalty, Kent & Vyxsin have been eliminated, on a very negative note. Good riddance. I’ve been getting tired of them for weeks.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 11, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 9

Gary & Mallory placed last in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 8 but were saved by a nonelimination.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Zev & Justin – 3:14AM
Second: Flight Time & Big Easy – 3:25AM
Third: Kent & Vyxsin – 3:39AM
Fourth: Kisha & Jen – 3:49AM
Fifth: Jet & Cord – 3:50AM
Sixth: Gary & Mallory – 4:36AM

The Globetrotters have been sharing information with everybody… except the cowboys. Jet & Cord don’t know if they’re outcasts, but they’re not buddies with anybody either. Kent & Vyxsin realize they’re bratty little kids, but they plan to be positive. Oh, this again.

Teams will now travel by train to Feldkirch, Austria and then cross the border to Schaanwald, Liechtenstein, a real country (with a population of 35,000 people). Everybody will be on the same train.

The road block is to measure the entire length of Liechetenstein using motorized bicycles, a map, and an odometer. It’s less hard than it sounds, as the entire country is only 22km long. Of course, if they screw up, that could be a problem.

As the final team to arrive at the road block, before they can proceed, Gary & Mallory must first complete their speed bump. They will have to create the proper mixture of gas and oil to power a Solex, one of the motorized bikes they will be riding on the road block.

Road block (in order of arrival): Justin, Flight Time, Jen, Jet, Vyxsin, Gary

On the first time through, people are already getting lost. At least they aren’t losing their maps, though, unlike Jen. By the time he arrives at Jet, Gary has 10.75, while Jet is up to 17.5. Those two decide to work together (at least until Jet ditches him), and so do Justin and Jen. Eventually, Gary catches up with a confused Vyxsin and starts working with her instead. Justin and in turn Jen are correct. Jet is way off, guessing 35km, so he’ll have to head back to the start. Flight Time thinks it’s 20, but rather than guessing, he stops Jen and Justin for the answer. Then he sees Gary and gives him the answer. This season is so stupid. These people don’t even have to think for themselves. With Vyxsin also getting the correct answer, that leaves Jet on his own to get the answer right on his second try.

The next stop is Gutenberg Castle, and from there they will travel by bus and train to Zermatt, Switzerland. The first two teams are on the first train, while the next three teams are on the second train. That leaves the cowboys bringing up the rear.

The detour is a choice between cheese or wheeze. In cheese, they will share a pot of cheese fondue. In wheeze, they will deliver 20 pieces of luggage to hotels throughout the city. Food task are typically not a good idea, as multiple teams found out last week (but that’s not stopping them from trying anyway).

Wheeze: Kisha & Jen (switched from cheese), Flight Time & Big Easy, Kent & Vyxsin, Gary & Mallory, Jet & Cord
Cheese: Zev & Justin

Justin immediately wants to bail on the cheese, but Zev insists that they stick around. Kisha’s stomach is upset before they even start, so it’s not long before they change their minds. Meanwhile, Vysin wants Kent to stop whining like a girl. The punishing 55 minute eating task won’t leave them feeling good, but it’s enough to keep Zev & Justin in first. After a couple of hotels, Gary & Mallory ask for a map. Jet & Cord get this on their first stop. Flight Time & Big Easy are cruising along and just about done, but then they are told that Hotel Christiania is not the same as Hotel Garni Christiania, but that doesn’t seem to have much impact on them. Ah, but then they have a second problem. They think they lost two of the luggage tags. Still not enough to put them behind the cowboys.

From there, they will proceed to the fountain at Inderbinen Brunnen. Here they hit the double U-turn. Zev & Justin decline to use it, not wanting to make enemies for no reason. Kisha & Jen have this same line of thinking. Having already U-turned Jaime & Cara, Kent & Vyxsin will have to pass. Gary & Mallory also choose not to U-turn anyone, knowing that the other two teams are battling with each other for last. Flight Time & Big Easy choose to U-turn Jet & Cord, as if the outcome of this leg weren’t obvious to begin with.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is the Moos Restaurant. So the double U-turn’s right before the pit stop? Really? Haven’t they learned their lesson from their previous bad race planning?

First: Zev & Justin (win a trip to Curacao)
Second: Kisha & Jen
Third: Kent & Vyxsin
Fourth: Gary & Mallory
Fifth: Flight Time & Big Easy
Eliminated: Jet & Cord

It’s worth repeating. What a stupid season. Jet & Cord have been eliminated, since most of the other teams got the answers from other people rather than having to actually work for it.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 10, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 8

In another uneventful departure, Ron & Christina were eliminated in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 7.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Flight Time & Big Easy – 2:07AM
Second: Zev & Justin – 2:12AM
Third: Kisha & Jen – 2:53AM
Fourth: Gary & Mallory – 3:30AM
Fifth: Jet & Cord – 3:35AM
Sixth: Kent & Vyxsin – 3:44AM

Teams will now fly to Vienna, Austria, a city more than 40 degrees colder than where they are now. Everybody arrives at the same travel agent, and they are all there together, with the opportunity to all get on the same flight. The cowboys opt for the later flight rather than take the risk of the tight connections. This puts them 25 minutes behind unless something happens to the others. Meanwhile, Kent & Vyxsin continue their bickering ways.

The first flight is not delayed, which once again puts Jet & Cord in the position of scrambling to catch up.

After a shameless plug for the new Ford Focus (which the leg winners will win), teams find out they must make to Schloss Schallaburg. The backup camera’s nice (I don’t know how I ever drove without one), but the lack of navigation system isn’t helping them find that castle too quickly. They go there merely to be told to go to a library in Vienna. It was a beautiful building until Flight Time decided to pee on it.

Vyxsin has a request for Kent: stop acting like a chick.

The detour is a choice between long hard walk and quick and easy meal. In long hard walk, teams will transport a couch 1 mile from a museum to a school, both of which Freud worked at. In quick and easy meal, they will pick up meals and eat all the food during one 12 minute rotation of the ferris wheel. If you don’t get the eating done in one shot, you’re not going to be able to do it in the second shot, so you will have to switch. At least the food is pretty good, but there’s a lot of it. Couch moving is less of a risk.

Long haul walk: Kent & Vyxsin, Flight Time & Big Easy, Kisha & Jen (switched from quick and easy meal), Zev & Justin (switched from quick and easy meal), Jet & Cord, Gary & Mallory (switched from quick and easy meal)

All three teams that tried the food failed. Although successfully completing this would have given them the lead, you’d think if they took more than 5 seconds to consider it they would have just all opted to go where they ended up anyway instead. Once they got there, they should have at least figured out there was just too much food. The wasted time is the break Jet & Cord needed to catch up. Since they’re stronger than most of the teams, they should be able to pull up to the front of the pack.

As for the couch moving, the Globetrotters do fine, and in the process the cowboys make up two spots. Justin’s left doing most of the work while Zev acts as the supervisor. Then there’s Kent, who whines a lot, while Vyxsin tells him to suck it up. Ultimately, in spite of the complaining, this seems like a pretty simple detour, albeit a tiring one.

From there, teams will drive to Salzburg. This drive presents the opportunity for Kent & Vyxsin to continue their negativity. She says she’ll never speak to him again if they get eliminated today. Promise?

The road block is to sweep chimneys. Seems simple enough. Gary & Mallory are hoping for something that will let them catch up, but this will not be it. Their only hope is that somebody gets lost.

Road block (in order of arrival): Big Easy, Zev, Vyxsin, Kisha, Cord, Gary

The pit stop for this leg of the race is Villa Trapp, the real home of the Von Trapp family from The Sound of Music.

First: Zev & Justin (each win a 2012 Ford Focus)
Second: Flight Time & Big Easy
Third: Kent & Vyxsin
Fourth: Kisha & Jen
Fifth: Jet & Cord
Noneliminated: Gary & Mallory

Darn. I was hoping to see Kent & Vyxsin never speak again. Unlike the last time when they were eliminated in leg 8, this time, Gary & Mallory finish last, but they are not eliminated and must complete a speed bump next week.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 9, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 7

Following a breakdown on the road block, Margie & Luke were eliminated in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 6.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Gary & Mallory – 1:18PM
Second: Jet & Cord – 1:52PM
Third: Ron & Christina – 1:53PM
Fourth: Zev & Justin – 1:54PM
Fifth: Kent & Vyxsin – 1:55PM
Sixth: Kisha & Jen – 2:03PM
Seventh: Flight Time & Big Easy – 3:45PM

Teams must now fly to Varanasi, India. It’s pretty safe to say everybody will be on the same flight. That safe bet, however, is not what some teams stumble upon. Cord says he’s just going to take the ticket agent’s word this is the earliest flight. It sure is the earliest flight… for that airline.

First flight (arrives at 10:45AM): Gary & Mallory, Kent & Vyxsin, Kisha & Jen, Flight Time & Big Easy, Ron & Christina, Zev & Justin
Second flight (arrives at 11:45AM): Jet & Cord

Varanasi’s a lot smaller than Kolkata at just over 1 million people, but that doesn’t make it any less hectic. Every vehicle is honking nonstop, but that’s not stopping the cows, elephants, and various assorted animals from roaming the streets.

The road block is a search for holy men using pictures. They will have to find all six men and arrange their six clues to learn the meaning of life, which they must tell to the final sadhu.

Road block (in order of arrival): Kent, Big Easy, Jen, Gary, Ron, Justin, Cord

In this season of giving the enemy a helping hand, Big Easy lets Jen follow him for a time, and later helps Justin. Kent then decides to follow Gary, although Kent quickly takes off once he has all the clues. Can’t blame him, but I wouldn’t be so keen to help him again either. While they’re waiting for their partners to complete the task, Mallory, Vyxsin, and Christina see cowboy hats. This is especially bad news for Ron & Christina as Ron wanders around aimlessly.

For those who are curious, the meaning of life is: once you’re over the hill you pick up speed.

The detour is a choice between feed the fire or feed the buffalo. In feed the fire, they must make 50 traditional fuel patties out of buffalo manure, slap them on a wall, load a stove with patties, and light a fire to boil milk. In feed the buffalo, they will pick up a large load of hay to deliver it to the address they have been given.

For the sake of cleanliness and somewhat improved smell, avoiding the manure task seems the wisest. At least they have been provided with gloves. Undeterred by her previous time wearing this outfit in manure in Russia, Mallory has again decided to wear it, only to be in the manure again.

Feed the buffalo: Zev & Justin, Flight Time & Big Easy, Jet & Cord, Ron & Christina
Feed the fire: Kisha & Jen, Kent & Vyxsin, Gary & Mallory

Whatever happens at the detour, once again the road block has already been the deciding factor. Jen throws a bit of a tantrum, and Vyxsin jumps out of the water taxi (probably the fastest way) and into the water that’s probably not intended for humans. But it’s all irrelevant in spite of the drama that an effort is made to create.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is Ramnagar Fort.

First: Flight Time & Big Easy (win a trip to Hawaii)
Second: Zev & Justin
Third: Kisha & Jen
Fourth: Gary & Mallory
Fifth: Jet & Cord
Sixth: Kent & Vyxsin
Eliminated: Ron & Christina

Ron & Christina have been eliminated, but they say they’re closer than they were before.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 8, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 6

Kent & Vyxsin’s atrocious performance for two days in a row proved to be irrelevant in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 5, as Jaime & Cara were eliminated following a road block that they struggled with.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Jet & Cord – 2:14PM
Second: Gary & Mallory – 2:16PM
Third: Margie & Luke – 2:48PM
Fourth: Kisha & Jen – 3:43PM
Fifth: Kent & Vyxsin – 3:52PM
Sixth: Flight Time & Big Easy – 3:59PM
Seventh: Ron & Christina – 4:09PM
Eighth: Zev & Justin – 4:10PM

We’re staying in China. Yeah, it’s like the Family Edition, in China. At Jin Fu Yi Zhan Tea Shop, teams will take place in a traditional tea tasting. What they are not told is that the tea they are drinking will appear during a challenge later in this leg. Zev says that stop was pointless.

After they are teased with some tea, they are told they will be flying 900 miles to Kolkata, India (what’s up with all these Indian cities changing their names?). Is that good news or bad? Everybody’s on the same flight, and they’re going to set up camp and wait until 10AM for the task to begin.

The road block brings us back to that tea tasting that’s not so pointless any more, or at least it seems somewhat less pointless. Kolkata is the place where Chinese tea comes to India and Indian tea goes to China. Their task will be to find the papaya mango tea amongst hundreds of cups.

Road block: Kent, Jet, Mallory, Luke, Flight Time, Kisha, Ron, Zev

Ron is very quickly correct, making it appear that perhaps this is not as difficult as it may have appeared. After 6 or 7 cups, Jet finally gets the trick: you have to smell the tea. Everybody else has an alternate strategy. They just keep drinking and hoping that they don’t get water intoxication. Zev seems to think smashing cups will help. By the time two teams are remaining, Flight Time says this is the hardest thing he’s ever done, but they made a pact they’re not going to lose by taking a penalty again. Once he gets it, Luke breaks down crying, as he still seems to cope with difficulty the same as he did the last time they raced.

Continuing with this trend, teams will now find the Tiward Tea Stall for their next clue, and they are told this on the caps of their bottles of tea. Jen & Kisha wander around trying to find the place where they make Snapple. This strategy gets them somewhat in the right area it seems. After more aimless wandering, they finally decide to open their tea. Lucky for them, they were the third ones out of the road block.

The detour is a choice between Hindu art or Bengali literature. In Hindu art, teams must paint, dress, and adorn a statue of a Hindu god. In Bengali literature, they will have to deliver 8 stacks of books in a rickshaw with the words “school van” by providing directions to their driver. Attention to detail task sounds easier than navigating a city of 15 million. The good news, however, is that India has the second largest English speaking population in the world, making it fairly easy to communicate with the locals.

Hindu art: Kent & Vyxsin, Ron & Christina, Kisha & Jen, Flight Time & Big Easy, Margie & Luke
Bengali literature: Gary & Mallory, Zev & Justin, Jet & Cord

Regardless of what happens here, it seems the road block has already determined the leg, although the delivery task proves to be much easier and will rearrange the order some.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is the Fountain of Joy.

First: Gary & Mallory (win 1 million rupees, or over $20,000)
Second: Jet & Cord
Third: Ron & Christina
Fourth: Zev & Justin
Fifth: Kent & Vyxsin
Sixth: Kisha & Jen
Seventh: Flight Time & Big Easy
Eliminated: Margie & Luke

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 7, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 5

Nobody was eliminated in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 4, and as such Kent & Vyxsin were unable to be put out of their misery just yet.

Returning to where we left off, Kent & Vyxsin have just realized that their fanny pack containing their passports, without which they cannot proceed, is missing. Somebody turned the pack in, so they are now free to begin racing again, still behind the rest of the pack.

In spite of all the drama, including a 1 week cliffhanger, all teams are now together. The earliest (and only) train departs at 7PM, and everybody will be on that. However, because they “chose” to take an alternate flight (chose meaning had no other choice because they were too incompetent to get to the airport in time), they will incur a 30 minute penalty at the next pit stop. They plan to not tell anybody about this penalty, but it would not be hard to guess. For that matter, Ron & Christina should be getting one, too, since they didn’t take a bus as instructed.

Once in Kunming, teams head for their first clue, which tells them they must travel by taxi to the Golden Horse and Jade Cock Memorial Archways (aka The Golden Arches, not to be confused with McDonald’s). Jet & Cord end up taking somebody’s taxi, which we later find out was the Globetrotters.

Zev & Justin aren’t even trying to keep it a secret that they’re following Ron & Christina.

The detour is a choice between honor the past and embrace the future. In honor the past, they must watch a traditional Tibetan performance, testing their powers of perception and memory, placing a set of 15 dolls in the order in which the characters appeared on stage. In embrace the future, teams must offload a complete solar water heating system, carry it to the roof of a building, and properly install it.

Honor the past: Ron & Christina, Zev & Justin, Kisha & Jen, Gary & Mallory
Embrace the future: Margie & Luke, Flight Time & Big Easy, Jaime & Cara, Kent & Vyxsin, Jet & Cord

Zev & Justin are wrong on their first guess. Ron & Christina are as well. Zev & Justin, however, are correct on their second guess, and it would seem that they have picked a fairly simple task. Kisha & Jen finish behind them. Both teams just wait for Ron & Christina to finish, since they know where they’re going. Although the other task does not seem particularly difficult either, it will be more physically demanding.

The Chinese Minority Heritage Center is their next stop, and they must locate it based on a photo. A double U-turn is ahead. Zev & Justin and Kisha & Jen find out that following somebody who speaks the language does not necessarily guarantee success, seeing as all three teams have now gone to the wrong place.

Margie & Luke decide not to U-turn. Jet & Cord make the same decision. Kent and Jaime arrive at the U-turn mat at the same time. Pretending he’s going to make an alternate decision and ignoring the advice of the three women behind him, Kent decides to U-turn Jaime & Cara, rather than the Globetrotters. This just seems to be U-turning for the sake of U-turning, and should not have much impact other than to bump the girls down a couple spots. Jaime & Cara decide to U-turn the Globetrotters before heading off to do the other detour. The Globetrotters are currently in last place, so this additional task will only add to that.

Zev & Justin have opted to break away from Ron & Christina, so now they are lost, with Gary & Mallory blindly following them.

The next stop is the Stone Forest. The road block is to put together a life size dinosaur based on a diagram. They must make sure it is built safely to avoid being rejected.

Road block (in order of arrival): Kisha, Christina, Margie, Kent, Jet, Big Easy, Jaime, Justin, Gary

Upon arriving at the road block, Vixsyin admits they have a penalty. They just “fudged around the truth” when they told their story about not knowing whether they were going to get a penalty.

Realizing they are in last place, Gary & Mallory use their express pass, which advances them to first place. However, since their cab has left, Jet & Cord are able to overtake them.

Slowly but surely the teams start to finish. Kent & Vyxsin are in the middle of the pack and seem like they will be okay. Then Flight Time & Big Easy try to see how obnoxiously loud they can celebrate not coming in last.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is Green Lake Park in Kunming.

First: Jet & Cord (win $5,000 each)
Second: Gary & Mallory
Third: Margie & Luke
Fourth: Kisha & Jen
Fifth: Kent & Vyxsin
Sixth: Flight Time & Big Easy
Seventh: Ron & Christina
Eighth: Zev & Justin
Eliminated: Jaime & Cara

Whatever happened the rest of the leg or last week for that matter doesn’t matter. It all comes down to Jaime’s struggles on the road block. While I don’t care for Jaime & Cara, Kent & Vyxsin shouldn’t be in this race any more.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 6, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.

The Amazing Race 18 Episode 4

Mike quit and blamed his dad in The Amazing Race 18 Episode 3, leading to the all too obvious elimination of Mel & Mike.

Teams depart in the order in which they arrived.

First: Zev & Justin – 8:44PM
Second: Gary & Mallory – 9:29PM
Third: Ron & Christina – 9:38PM
Fourth: Kisha & Jen – 9:50PM
Fifth: Flight Time & Big Easy – 10:01PM
Sixth: Jet & Cord – 10:34PM
Seventh: Kent & Vyxsin – 11:33PM
Eighth: Margie & Luke – 11:52PM
Ninth: Jaime & Cara – 12:42AM

Teams must now travel 2700 miles to Lijiang, China and make their way to Jade Dragon Mountain. Due to limited availability, all teams will get on the same flight from Tokyo to Kunming, China, and from there they will make arrangements to get to their destination.

Ron & Christina have both been to Lijiang, and they speak Chinese. Last time they were in China, Jen called Luke a bitch. Jaime was in a miserable mood last time they went to China, although I couldn’t tell the difference between that and her normal miserable mood.

Kent & Vyxsin are already arguing just to find their car and get it open. She continues to crumble as they look for the airport. Seeing as the flight is not until 9:50AM, that gives them about 10 hours from their departure to find it. After the sun rises, she realizes they have been going the wrong way. The other eight teams are boarding, wondering where the heck Kent & Vyxsin are, since they had enough time to walk there if they needed to. With the “required” flight having already taken off, they are left having to board the “alternate” one at 3:30PM. The first flight lands at 7:17PM; the second flight lands at 1:35AM.

They have the option of plane or train. The flight leaves at 7AM. Trains leave at 8:50 or 10:16, and everybody opts for that. By the time they arrive, Kent & Vyxsin are left with no option other than taking the plane. They just need to find Vyxsin’s passport first.

First Train (departs at 8:50PM): Ron & Christina
Second Train (departs at 10:16PM): Zev & Justin, Gary & Mallory, Kisha & Jen, Flight Time & Big Easy, Jet & Cord, Margie & Luke, Jaime & Cara
Flight (departs at 7AM, arrives at 8:15AM): Kent & Vyxsin

Bus transfers begin at 8AM, which puts the people who took trains on even footing. Kent & Vyxsin are not too far behind.

Their task on the mountain is to saddle a yak and ride it across the river. From there, they will ride a gondola even higher up the mountain to Spruce Meadow. This takes them from 10,000 feet up to 14,783 feet up, making even remotely physical tasks difficult.

The road block is to search among thousands of zodiac charms for the 12 animals of the Chinese zodiac. Once they find all the animals, they must put them in the correct order.

Road block (in order of arrival): Luke, Cord, Jaime, Mallory, Big Easy, Jen, Zev, Christina, Vyxsin

Luckily for her, Christina knows all the animals, in both English and Chinese. Other teams are not so lucky. Cord is left making chicken clucking noises. As for Big Easy, he’s asking the local livestock whether they have seen anything.

As Jet & Cord make their way back down the mountain, they see Kent & Vyxsin for the first time in 2 days. This is particularly bad news for Zev & Justin, as Zev struggles to complete the road block. Justin realizes that they did not take the flight that they were supposed to take, and there’s a question of whether there’s some penalty for not taking a mandatory flight. After much struggle, Zev finally realizes a goat is not a small horse. Meanwhile, Vyxsin continues to struggle, as she has since the pit start. A crying Vyxsin has no clue what’s going on. They had a chance to catch up, but if she’s going to waste time having a breakdown, they may as well just quit.

Marked buses will take them to Old Town Lijiang. Ron & Christina view this as a direction to just get on the first motor vehicle they see. When they do realize they’re not on a bus, they have to turn around. After Ron has one of his meltdowns, they manage to get the bus to stop and let them on, as Flight Time & Big Easy tell the driver to stop. This hardly seems like it’s not a rule violation, taking something other than a bus part of the way.

Each teammate will have to locate their sign and make a wish to receive their next clue. This leads to amusing comments like “I am a snake.” Flight Time’s wish is he knew what his zodiac sign was, so he just tries them all.

The detour is a choice between hammer or horn. In hammer, teams must pulverize and prepare candy using hammers. In horn, teams must lead a procession of dancers to the palace while carrying a long horn.

Hammer: Margie & Luke, Gary & Mallory, Ron & Christina, Jet & Cord, Kisha & Jen, Jaime & Cara
Horn: Flight Time & Big Easy, Zev & Justin

Christina is left having to babysit her father. He wants to stop to eat, and he wants to take the tram. If she says no enough, maybe he’ll focus on the task at hand. Or maybe he’ll stop to snack on the candy, all the while serving as a distraction to her.

The pit stop for this leg of the race is the Eternal Tower, rising high above the old town.

First: Margie & Luke (win a trip to Aruba)
Second: Jet & Cord
Third: Gary & Mallory
Fourth: Ron & Christina
Fifth: Kisha & Jen
Sixth: Flight Time & Big Easy
Seventh: Jaime & Cara
Eighth: Zev & Justin
Ninth: Kent & Vyxsin

Once again, the leg isn’t over. They’re still racing. This is lucky for Kent & Vyxsin. Not only did they have a disastrous leg, but adding insult to injury, they lost their fanny pack on the gondola. Most importantly, it contains their passports. We leave with Vyxsin begging their driver to stop and turn around… and being ignored.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Amazing Race 18 Episode 5, which airs Sunday at 8/7c on CBS.