America’s Got Talent 3 Episode 1 brought us some more talented individuals (and some not so talented ones). Opera singer Neal Boyd looks to be the frontrunner thus far, although 4-year-old Kaitlyn Maher captured the most attention.
Tonight we start off in Los Angeles.
55-year-old part-time nanny Victoria has been waiting for this break her whole life. She’s a singing fairy. Oh no. Do we really need to see this to know how badly she’ll bomb? Piers buzzes her quickly. Then the audience boos her. Hasselhoff buzzes her. Sharon wants her to keep going. Piers calls her a bit weird and says that her dream is his nightmare.
Eli Mattson typically travels for days on buses just praying he’ll finally hit the right random place on the map. He sings Walking in Memphis while playing the keyboard. He’s pretty good, if not quite great. Piers tells him he’s got talent. Sharon can’t believe he hasn’t been signed. Hasselhoff’s reminded of a young Billy Joel.
Former small town gal Cassie now works in a bar and has purple hair and tattoos all over. Her stage name is Miss Pussykatt. In an effort to prove to her parents that her talents can take her somewhere, she does a grinding act, where she shoots sparks off the metal clothing she’s wearing. She won’t win $1 million with this, but it’s entertaining to watch nonetheless.
Lil Countrie & Page 1NE survived hurricane Katrina but are pressing on. They tell a story about their uncle, who sacrificed himself so that the kids could be rescued instead. They perform a very impressive acrobatic dance act. Hasselhoff calls them the best tumblers he’s ever seen. Sharon calls them brilliant. (Video of Lil Countrie & Page’s performance)
Next stop is New York.
Michael is an extreme percussionist. His act is called Drumtazia. Does anybody tonight not have a stupid name? I don’t get this act, stupid name or not. At least they finally buzzed him. Piers tells him he’s a complete and utter looney.
Family boy band Next II None (what, you expected a name that wasn’t stupid?) sings Bye Bye Bye. They’re bouncing around too much to really judge their singing ability, but they’re good performers. Sharon notices a lack of a great lead singer but appreciates what they did. Piers likes the whole package. They’re going through to the next round.
The Canadian Russian Bar Trio consists of two men (holding a bar) and one woman (doing gymnastics on the bar). The bar is about 4 inches wide, and they’re bouncing her about 10 or 15 feet in the air. I’m impressed she didn’t break anything. They’re going to continue on. (Video of Russian Bar Trio’s performance)
Ozzy Osbourne impersonator The Ozzman is happy to meet Sharon. She’s not quite as happy to meet him and listen to him suck. Piers gives him a yes to give Sharon a hard time, but the other two reject him. He promises us he’ll be back.
The Taubl family is a group of string musicians, with parents and kids of varying ages. Piers buzzes them. Eventually, they begin singing as well. They’re good, but I doubt to what extent they’d be entertaining to watch for any length of time. Hasselhoff calls them an excellent act. Piers sort of admits he may be a tiny bit wrong and wants them to continue on.
The DC Cowboys are fit guys who plan to dance and shake their butts. They’re bound to have the women on their feet, even if most of them are probably gay. Hasselhoff thinks America will love them. Piers thought it was good fun.
Next stop is Chicago. So like do we keep going round and round in circles to the same cities each week?
Kevin Taylor (look, a real name) is a brick breaker. He hopes this appearance will allow him to be taken seriously. He will break 100 bricks on fire. He gets through it just fine, despite his hand catching on fire. Don’t try this at home. Sharon says no because she doesn’t want to see him get hurt. Hasselhoff says yes. After convincing him it won’t be more of the same (which was my concern as well), Piers lets him through.
Chellena Black-Harris is a singer who two years ago was diagnosed with cervical cancer. She’s happy to have the opportunity to be able to perform now. It only takes a few notes for her to show she’s got talent. Hasselhoff says this is what the show’s all about. Piers calls it good but not great, with three or four singers that have gone through who are better than her. The audience lets him know they’re fully behind her, and he agrees to let her go to Vegas.
Johnny Olshavsky is a magician. Piers is quick to buzz. Then the audience boos. Then everybody buzzes him. Piers doesn’t even want to let him speak. If only there were a point to this act.
Following a pathetic magicians montage, husband and wife Jonathan and Charlotte Pendragon come out. He tells us a story of how he nearly died when an arrow went through him. He hops in a case, and she ties/locks him up. They end up reversing positions, and when the case is opened, she’s the one tied up inside it. This magic act finally gets a thumbs up.
The rest of the tribute acts have fallen on their faces. Now it’s time for the king. Joseph Hall is one of 8 million Elvis impersonators. Jerry Springer tells us Elvis is not dead (he just went home). Piers likes that he sings how he looks. Sharon wants to keep staring at him and wants to know whether she’d be robbing the cradle. (Video of Joseph Hall’s performance)
Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another recap of America’s Got Talent 3 episode 3, which airs Tuesday at 9/8c on NBC.