Big Brother 8 Episode 32

Warning: Tonight’s show has the potential to be one of the worst, most irritating shows in the history of Big Brother. This is CBS’ attempt to convince us their storyline was great. Dick/Danielle fans may love it. Anyone else, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Just in case anyone still cares, welcome to another live blog of Big Brother 8. It’s a recap episode, so basically a way to waste time. We get to take a look back at the season with one of the more horrendous final twos in the show’s history. Great. An hour with Delusional and his daughter, More Delusional (and whiny). And she’ll probably still be whining, despite her place in the finals.

We start off with her day one supposedly not having talked to him for two years because he loaned her money once or something. Back when she didn’t want to even hug him. At least now she pretends she wants to hug him. Then three weeks later, she gets upset with him and storms off. Then the next day, more whining and crying. Oh god. This show’s going to suck worse than I originally anticipated.

Now we’re looking back at day 74 and the HOH competition. This was last week. Why do we need to see this crap again? It didn’t work to convince us the season was fair the first time, and it’s not working tonight.

Good. We’re done with that garbage. Now a look back at something that’s somewhat more interesting. Starting with Dick attacking Jen. He’s going to be pissed off when he gets out of the house and realizes he personally made Jen one of the more popular houseguests. I’ve got bad news for you, Dick. Jen actually talks to her father, and is far less self centered than Danielle.

Next, the moment CBS considers pure gold: Dick’s “brilliant” attempt to get himself so hated that he gets kicked out of the house. Wouldn’t it have been smarter to just wait for veto, then go off on everybody after it was over? Nope, not Dick. Act first, think later… maybe.

Then it’s time for some more prayer with Jameka and Amber, followed by Dick mocking their religion and lots of aruging. Yeah, because this wasn’t uncomfortable enough to watch the first time.

And of course, this recap show wouldn’t be complete without Danielle’s “love interest,” the guy she knew for like three weeks, Nick. This is as ridiculous as Janelle and Michael, which lasted all of about two minutes once they got out of the house and realized not only did they not love each other… they didn’t even like each other. Does anybody honestly care about Danielle and Nick? I see more hope in the Jessica/Eric relationship, so the look back at these two is not quite as nauseating.

Then we go back to when everybody hated Jen, when she cried about her picture on the wall. Hey, CBS, you forgot that the currently #1 houseguest on your popularity poll is Zach, though that’s largely in protest of the final two. Don’t forget to try to make us hate him, too. The crying over the picture is followed by when people started to really like Jen, when Dick dumped iced tea on her head, then when she got revenge by destroying his cigarettes, and when CBS allowed him to get away with burning her and physically intimidating her.

Did we need to see an Amber crying montage and her delusion over being a model, of course, followed by her going insane and pretending Eric is evil?

50 minutes into the show, we finally get something not bitter, hateful, and mean-spirited. Zach streaking, Eric dressing in Jessica’s clothing, Jen and Eric wrestling, various fun veto competitions (since HOH is never fun). After that, Dick and Danielle start planning their trip to Europe, and Danielle makes sure she says they won’t be going together, also emphasizing that if she wins, he ain’t getting any of it. Yeah, great reunion. About three minutes of being positive. Could there possibly be a worse final two in this respect, too? Nick notwithstanding, these two hate and have absolutely no use for anybody else in the house, including each other.

Well, that wraps up a particularly pointless episode. Why didn’t they just reveal the winner tonight? Speaking of the winner, I will be doing a live blog of the finale on Tuesday… again, just in case anybody cares.