Category: reality tv

Aubrey was finally fired in The Celebrity Apprentice 5 Episode 13, setting up a final showdown between Clay Aiken and Arsenio Hall.

Trump starts off the evening getting a ride from an Andretti. I seem to remember him going out of his way to fire one of them for no good reason earlier in the season.

For all the drama of the cliffhanger we were left with, the video Arsenio received of Magic Johnson is perfectly usable. Typical.

The Clay/Debbie wall painting drama continues. When he receives pictures of her cousin’s past work, he agrees to let her paint. Because you wouldn’t want your walls to look silly when you’re putting on a carnival.

Aubrey continues to remind us that, in spite of the fact that she’s been fired, she’s still the best one there and the only reason Clay has anything.

Lou Ferrigno has gone out and given 110%, raising $41,000 for his charity, and George Takei has also raised about $60,000, much of it from himself. Dayana Mendoza does not have anything positive to say about Lisa, who did not display anything positive that could be said about her. Victoria Gotti refers to Aubrey as a cartoon character and Lisa as crude, rude, and classless. Tia Carrere doesn’t need to name names because everybody knows, but she’s not surprised to see two men in the finale.

When the parties start, there are Claymates everywhere. In Arsenio’s line, there’s about 6 people. Hopefully they’ll show up eventually.

Clay gets some donations from singers, and his largest initial donation is $20,000, pooled together by a bunch of his fans. Arsenio’s getting donations from comedians like Jay Leno and Eddie Murphy. Lisa manages to sneak away from Arsenio’s party, which she’s supposed to be working, to make a $10,000 donation to Clay.

After mingling on their own for a while, the parties cross together for Arsenio’s stand up and Clay’s musical show.

Aubrey’s blonde now. She seems surprised that anybody could have taken offense, but says this was a learning experience and apologizes for offending everybody.

Arsenio’s team raised $167,100; Clay’s team raised $301,500. Less impressive than what we’ve seen in years past, but still respectable. Based on how they tried to make it seem he never really focused on fundraising, plus taking into account who was on each team, I was not expecting Clay to have such a lopsided money victory. Trump tells us this isn’t all the task is being judged on, but it would seem very difficult to overcome.

Dayana would vote for Arsenio based on her experience working with Clay.

Ivanka says Clay was liked by almost everybody, strategically refined, and assertive when he needed to be. Arsenio was a bit more passive but highly effective as a leader, in spite of having a few more enemies.

The Celebrity Apprentice 5 winner is Arsenio Hall. Clay again has to settle for runner up status.

Teresa got fired after losing as project manager in The Celebrity Apprentice 5 Episode 12. Then the final four were narrowed down further when Lisa was fired, in spite of for the first time not having a bad attitude for a stretch of about half an hour.

With one person having already faced the post-interview firing, that leads us to one more person left to be fired.

Because the interviewers thought she was an inexperienced chess player, finally Aubrey been fired. Finally. She walks out the door with her ego as big as ever, but acknowledges she’s an unfinished person.

What a productive few minutes that was. First Lisa, then Aubrey. Good riddance to the people who insist they came up with every (bad) idea in the most abrasive manner possible.

That leaves us with a final two of Arsenio Hall and Clay Aiken.

They will have to sell tickets for their charity event, produce a 30 second charity awareness ad, and put on a variety show.

Having won every time he was project manager, Arsenio gets to start building his team first.

Arsenio: Adam Carolla, Lisa Lampanelli, Paul Teutul Sr, Teresa Giudice
Clay: Penn Gillette, Debbie Gibson, Dee Snider, Aubrey O’Day

Arsenio focuses on comedy with his strange first picks, while Clay somehow manages to land all three musicians.

Adam suggests that his team tell donors they’re buying tickets not for themselves but for kids. When I think kid friendly, Adam Carolla and Lisa Lampanelli sure top my list. Arsenio promptly rejects this concept.

Aubrey hopes that Clay wins. She doesn’t like Arsenio.

Arsenio thinks the comedy will be easy enough. He can get a laugh at a funeral. But his end goal is to have Magic Johnson’s words about the charity take the spotlight.

Clay chose Penn in an effort to show Trump he could work with anybody. He’s starting to regret that, as Penn is shooting down ideas, which is what Clay had such a problem with when they worked together. Penn’s hope is to present the overcoming of the disability, rather than wallowing in it.

Why Arsenio snapped up Paul is now clear. He’s the money raiser. If history is any indication, this is very smart, as Paul raised over $300k in week 1. Lisa was so sure she was going to win that she’s already got $50k set aside for this task.

On the other team, there is no apparent focus on raising money, though they do seem to be creating a good event.

Dee’s dreading where this task is going. Is he really going to have to sing Baby Love with Debbie Gibson? In addition to that, Debbie is looking forward to singing her long forgotten tune that we’ve heard 108 times this season, Shake Your Love.

Clay wanted to shoot the video in a park. In New York City, they’re having trouble finding anywhere outdoors that’s not a skyscraper. The best they can get is a place with bars on the windows, but the director of photography is sure he can edit it so it doesn’t look completely depressing.

Lisa may be on the other team, but to thank Clay for helping raise money for her charity, she wants to buy a ticket to his event.

Clay’s getting frustrated, which is rubbing off on the rest of his team. Penn and Clay never got along to begin with, while Debbie is taking personal offense to what’s happening with the mural she wants her cousin to paint on the wall, which Clay refuses to give the okay for until he sees a sketch.

Arsenio has taken the opposite approach, as he’s a lot more hands off and just trusting those he’s appointed, some might say too much.

Adam’s crew has finally delivered the file of the footage of Magic Johnson. What Adam failed to reveal to Arsenio is that these aren’t professional video people. We get the hint of this when the entire thing is sideways.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of The Celebrity Apprentice 5 Episode 14, where we will find out who The Celebrity Apprentice 5 winner is, which airs Sunday at 9/8c on NBC.