Category: survivor south pacific

Remember when Ozzy had control of the game? Me neither. But what little control he did have went up in smoke in Survivor: South Pacific Episode 5 when the tribe once again took out the girl he was hoping to be his main ally, Elyse.

Ozzy tells his tribe that he’s on his own and a free agent. That should work out for you about as well as your last two very poor attempts at winning this show. He also tells the tribe he’s got the idol. Like the idol twist that he got so stupidly wrapped up in during his first season, he’s pinning all his hopes in redemption.

Jim is pleased with Ozzy’s hissy fit. It shouldn’t be very hard to get rid of him now.

Brandon gets a clue to the hidden immunity idol. Coach and Albert let him think the idol is still up for grabs. Coach withholds information and then lies, but he’s still playing honorably. I don’t care if you’re going to lie. Just be honest about it.

Before the duel, Christine starts crying. Oh, not this again. Feel free to throw the challenge and head to Ponderosa if it’s that bad. In the meantime, blink once if you’re being held there against your will. Twice if an almighty deity is the one holding you hostage. The duel is shuffleboard. After a couple shots, Christine gives her tribe the finger. She is the first to score, then Elyse ties it at 1. Christine takes the 2-1 lead. Elyse knocks herself off to give Christine the 3-1 lead. Elyse makes it 3-2. Then ties it 3-3. Christine wins her fourth duel. In her words, unfortunately.

Coach wants to get rid of Mikayla next rather than Edna, who’s not part of the alliance but is part of his alliance.

So after pouting for a day, Ozzy realizes he’s a big baby and has no choice but to try to work with somebody on his tribe.

For the challenge, they will assemble a wheelbarrow, push it through obstacles, and use it to collect coconuts. The remaining tribe members will take the wheelbarrow apart and use the pieces to build a slingshot and fire coconuts at targets. Reward is a visit to the sliding rocks, a natural waterslide, for a picnic. Edna sits out for Upolu. Both tribes assemble their wheelbarrows at the same time, but Upolu takes the lead when Ozzy and Dawn can’t figure out how to steer. As Savaii continues to struggle, Upolu takes the 1-0 lead. Savaii finally builds their slingshot and ties it 1-1, and Coach wants Mikayla to quit. Upolu takes the 2-1 lead. Savaii ties it 2-2, and Coach again asks Mikayla to sit out. Upolu retakes the lead. Savaii ties it 3-3 and then takes the lead with 2 more points as Jim and Keith continue to perform well. Savaii wins immunity and reward.

Now that the challenge is over, Coach has a new plan. He wants to get rid of Mikayla. Oh wait. That’s the old plan. The explanation, however, is new. She was not coachable in the challenge. I didn’t realize coaching somebody meant telling them to quit repeatedly.

Albert believes he can get Coach to change his mind about the vote and get rid of Edna instead. He wants to get rid of the weak link and also the smarter player who Coach thinks he’s controlling. Even Brandon says he wants to keep Mikayla but won’t because he’s going to keep his word.

This leaves Coach, Brandon, and Edna on one side and Albert, Sophie, and Mikayla on the other, making Rick the deciding vote.

Those who want to vote for Edna argue that loyalty is more important than strength for after the merge; those who want to vote for Mikayla argue that strength is more important to get to the merge with numbers.

Next up, Brandon’s mouth. First, if people are going to vote against loyalty, go ahead and vote him out tonight. Good idea. Second, he doesn’t trust either Mikayla or Edna. He wants to get rid of Mikayla, but he’s going to keep his word. To an extent, I can appreciate his word meaning something, but does anybody really want to be allied with a guy who says everything he thinks?

Votes
Mikayla
Edna
Mikayla
Edna
Mikayla
Edna
Mikayla

By a vote of 4-3, Mikayla has been voted off the island.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 7, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

As the biggest outcast in her tribe, Stacey was sent packing in Survivor: South Pacific Episode 4.

We start off with more crying from Brandon. What is this, Big Brother?

Stacey, who hates everybody anyway, warns Savaii to look out for her old tribe. By the way, the name of the guy running the tribe is Benjamin. Her sour grapes, while mildly amusing, are just that. The duel is to keep catching balls in a chute. They start with one ball, and more will be added as time goes by, up to six total. Stacey quickly disregards Probst’s advice to be careful about spacing. Not long after, she is out, and Christine stays alive.

Coach tells his tribe to not call him Benjamin to his face, or he’s going to go nuts (again?).

Ozzy asks how to spell Cochran. That’s not a good sign.

Hearing the story about how Benjamin is in charge, Ozzy says that, if he were smart, he’d get rid of Albert soon. Does that mean Ozzy’s going to target somebody strong on his tribe?

Realizing he’s in trouble, having been pointed out as one of Coach’s top allies, Albert goes and finds the clue to the hidden immunity idol. After searching for a while without any luck, he reveals the clue to Coach and Sophie. Coach is the one who ends up finding it. Hope handing it away pays off for you, Al.

Cochran’s getting tired of Ozzy. Me, too. He calls him a lazy ass who just has a few moments of brightness each day.

At the immunity challenge, they are greeted by a roasted pig. It’s not for eating, though. Rather, it’s for chewing with their hands tied behind their backs. All these challenges leave me with a sense of deja vu. Reward is veggies, spices, bread, and another clue to the idol (both of which have already been found). As gross challenges go, this is up there with the best of them. After they’re done, time for weighing. Savaii has 22 pounds and 12 ounces of meat and bodily fluids. Upolu weighs in at 22 pounds and 14 ounces. Upolu wins immunity and reward by 2 ounces. The difference: Mikayla scooped a piece of meat off the ground that Rick deliberately left there. In addition to their reward, they also get the bucket of meat.

Dawn says the back of one of her molars is gone. If true, that could be a game ender. Tooth pain in the middle of nowhere. Bad combination. Ozzy’s also got a chipped tooth and a dislocated jaw, and everybody else has cuts in their mouths. Cochran warns them they’ll get herpes.

Cochran hopes to prove he’s a worker bee, but is that enough to save him? His hope is that he, Dawn, and Jim will be able to pry Elyse and Ozzy apart. Jim hopes to sway Keith to vote their way. Perhaps he can use Ozzy’s theory of voting out strong people prior to the merge to sway him. Keith and Whitney now have to make the deciding vote between either Cochran or Elyse.

Here’s the dilemma. They want to betray Ozzy, but they still want to be allied with him. With Jim having shifted, the alliance is fractured regardless. Seems to make more sense to just go with the majority. Cochran doesn’t care if Ozzy thinks everybody is against him. That’s exactly what he wants him to think.

Votes
Cochran
Elyse
Cochran
Elyse
Dawn
Dawn
Elyse

Whitney and Keith chose to keep the blood off their hands by throwing votes Dawn’s way, but the damage is done either way. With 3 votes, Elyse has been voted off the island.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 6, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

Following a vote about who had the dumbest nickname, Papa Bear was voted out in Survivor: South Pacific Episode 3.

Jim is under the impression that Elyse is Ozzy’s showmance, which might be a good plan if Ozzy’s showmance wasn’t irrelevant and didn’t already get voted out on day 3. Jim approaches Cochran with his plot to get rid of her.

Brandon apologizes to Mikayla for being a putz. Then he tells Edna about his alliance of 5.

Ozzy doesn’t like Cochran because he talks a lot about strategy, something Ozzy has proved to be miserable at.

Cochran and Jim go to watch the duel together, and they are joined by Brandon and Edna. Christine and Papa Bear are in the duel. Brandon apologizes to Christine for what happened at tribal council. Oh geez. The duel is to toss sandbags and land them on top of 10 crates. With 5 in a row, Christine’s on a roll. Papa’s keeping things interesting, but she retains her lead for some time. Papa Bear catches her at 8 for a couple seconds, then he ties it again at 9. With the final score, Christine wins the duel.

Edna’s additional attempts to emphasize her social game are not going over well with Stacey or Mikayla, both of whom are not terribly important to impress anyway.

Dawn would rather get rid of Ozzy, but she’s willing to go along with the plan to get rid of Elyse if that’s what Jim and Cochran are interested in doing. Even still, they seem to be 1 vote shy.

It’s a weight holding battle. Reward is chickens. Two men and one woman from each tribe will be the weight bearers: Keith, Dawn, and Jim against Brandon, Stacey, and Albert. After 26 minutes, Dawn and Stacey are at 100 pounds, Albert and Keith are at 180, and Jim and Brandon at 200. Seems that one tribe is just echoing the choices of the other. Keith is the first one to drop. Brandon and Jim tie the Survivor record of 220 pounds. In the meantime, Albert drops. Jim and Brandon then break the record at 240 pounds. Jim drops, and Brandon follows him. At this point, Stacey is holding on to the weight with her butt. 120 pounds. Then 140. Stacey drops. Savaii wins immunity and reward.

Stacey thinks that maybe she could be blindsided. Then it really wouldn’t be a blindside. In addition to not liking Edna still, she warns Brandon to watch out for Albert, Sophie, and Mikayla, to which Coach responds that he may as well just throw in the towel if he’s going to buy this. Brandon’s loose cannon behavior is not helping him any with those who wish to remain allied with him.

When asked by Probst what the most annoying thing about Edna is, Brandon says she’s got a lot to say about a lot. She disagrees, but now we’re getting to the point where it’s becoming a pattern.

Brandon says he’s not here to play Russell’s game. He’s here to play Brandon’s game. I’d rather he play Russell’s game. Oh, and God, blah blah blah. God doesn’t care about Survivor. I’m not even sure he watches it.

Votes
Edna
Stacey
Stacey
Stacey
Stacey
Stacey

With 5 votes, Stacey has been voted off the island. She makes an extra effort to avoid Coach’s hug goodbye. If you really intend to get back into this game, you’re going to need to get over yourself.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 5, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

Coach directed his team to get rid of Christine in Survivor: South Pacific Episode 2.

Brandon came into this game not wanting to be like his uncle. He’s not. He’s worse. At least Russell seemed to have some purpose and logic to his lies.

Coach & Stacey and Ozzy & Elyse head to watch the battle between Semhar and Christine, a balancing act. Before the challenge can begin, Semhar has some poem about taking off her clothes and giving birth to 10 kids without drugs. No thanks, I’m good with just the watching the challenge. Their task is to balance a totem on poles, adding new sections of poles at intervals. Hopefully one of them doesn’t get knocked out when the totem falls. Semhar is the one to drop, keeping Christine alive. Semhar departs, still complaining about how Survivor is not fair. This challenge result leaves both Ozzy and Coach disappointed. Couldn’t have asked for more.

It’s been almost a whole week, so now would be a good time for Brandon to admit his last name to his entire tribe. And in case you didn’t get the memo, he loves God.

As the oldest member of his tribe who doesn’t click with anybody, Papa Bear sees himself as one of the prime targets for elimination.

Remember Ozzy’s plan to keep news of his idol discovery to himself? He tells Keith he’s got it. After all, he trusts him. So of course Keith tells Whitney.

Mikayla confronts Brandon about him trying to get rid of her. He says it’s because of her attitude. Really? I thought it was because she made you think impure thoughts by being more attractive than your wife. He then calls a creepy group meeting to lie to everybody about why he doesn’t like her and to keep him out of the drama. Oh, and he’s a Christian, by the way.

At the immunity challenge, one person will race across a floating bridge with a bodyboard, grab a bag, and hang on as the rest of the tribe pulls them back to shore. Once they have all five bags, the remaining tribe members will retrieve them with grappling hooks, and then solve the seemingly simple banner puzzle. Reward is coffee, tea, chocolate, and cookies. This seems to be a challenge suited to Ozzy, but his tribe is struggling to feed the rope to him, giving Upolu an early lead. Dawn manages to erase that lead and take over. Ozzy extends the lead. Unlike her first run, Dawn struggles, as Brandon’s second try is again successful and reverses the lead back to his tribe. After Ozzy loses his board, Upolu goes into the final stage in the lead, but it’s still very close. Coach and Edna go against Louise and Whitney on the grappling hooks. As Coach is dragging up his fifth bag, Whitney is one behind with her fourth. The puzzle does not seem complicated enough for Savaii to be able to catch up. Upolu wins immunity and reward.

Papa Bear Mark and Cochran are the two targets for tonight’s vote. Either way, they both seem to be sitting ducks.

They decide on Papa Bear, telling him Cochran’s going home (he doesn’t believe them) while telling Cochran Papa’s going home (he doesn’t trust them). Papa Bear goes not so subtly to search for the idol. Not finding it, he makes a fake idol, returning with a bulge in his pants about 5 minutes later.

Papa Bear’s hope at tribal council is to stir things up, repeatedly mentioning “the five”.

Votes
Papa Bear
Cochran
Jim
Papa Bear
Papa Bear
Papa Bear

With 4 votes, Papa Bear has been voted off the island.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 4, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

In spite of Ozzy’s rather transparent attempt to save her, Semhar’s poor challenge performance in Survivor: South Pacific Episode 1 sealed her fate as the first person to be eliminated.

Coach reveals the names of his alliance members for those (like me) who missed it the first time: Coach, Rick, Sophie, Brandon, and Albert. He’s also got a side alliance with Edna.

Johnny Cochran has decided to do some work and ignore his mother’s instructions to not work with a machete without supervision.

Ozzy starts climbing trees looking for the hidden immunity idol. Somehow, this works. Unlike when he was an idiot and bowed down to the idol when Yul had it and then was an idiot again when he didn’t use it and got blindsided, he says he plans to use it wisely this time but won’t let anybody know he has it.

Brandon says he feels guilty because God doesn’t want him lying. Oh I hope this won’t drag on very long. His brilliant plan to hide who he is? Done on day 4 when he tells Coach, who considers Russell his number 1 nemesis.

Jim has a 3+2 plan: a core of himself, Ozzy, and Keith, plus Elyse and Whitney. This falls in line with what Ozzy and Keith were planning the night before.

Brandon doesn’t feel comfortable around Mikayla. I don’t think God approves of these impure thoughts. He dubs her Parvati.

Stacey’s loss is Christine’s gain. Everybody suspects she has been hunting for that hidden immunity idol (she has been), and she stumbles across something, though it’s just a clue.

At the challenge, they will unwind long ribbons from a pole and use the keys to release the other half of the tribe, who will move heavy crates across a platform until they can release the largest crate to be moved to another platform. Reward is pillows, blankets, a hammock, and a mat, plus a clue to the idol. Edna sits out for Upolu. Upolu’s working well together on the ribbons while Savaii struggles. The members of Upolu are free as Savaii continues to drag. Probst tells Dawn this is not a picnic. Upolu struggled on the very first challenge, and they’re repeating that performance again as they lose their lead on the puzzle. Savaii wins immunity and reward.

Wanting to flush the idol and get rid of Christine, Coach suggests a 3-3-3 vote. Brandon wants Mikayla gone. He says he will not change his mind, no matter what. As a suspiciously large group of them are standing around discussing this, Mikayla approaches, and Coach asks her for some privacy, then walks away. Weird.

Brandon blames Christine and Stacey for wanting vote Mikayla out. Coach brings this up at tribal council. They are confused. He refuses to say who gave him this information. Christine again reminds him he’s temporary. Brandon breaks down and admits he’s a liar. An honest liar.

Votes
Sophie
Edna
Christine
Stacey
Christine
Stacey
Christine
Stacey
Christine

With 4 votes, Christine has been voted off the island.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 3, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

A new set of 18 castaways have gathered in Samoa to compete for the title of sole Survivor. The 16 newbies are joined by Ozzy and Coach. From Boston Rob and Russell down to Ozzy and Coach. This is the most pointless combination ever of two not good players. I came for the caviar; I ended up with a bologna sandwich. Brandon Hantz (Russell’s nephew) is arguably the bigger draw here than both of them.

The new contestants travel in on their boat. As I’m trying to get over the concept that some of them were stupid enough to wear jeans, we’re told two people are heading in by helicopter. The woman standing next to Brandon says she hopes one of them is not Russell. He will never, ever tell them his last name is Hantz. Too bad he’s got multiple tattoos that say it. Christine refers to them as temporary players.

So apparently Mikayla is a lingerie football player. I don’t know what that is. John Cochran (no relation to the guy who freed OJ I presume) wants to be called by his last name like Probst’s favorite players. He does not hide the fact that he’s a huge Survivor fan.

Ozzy picks a red egg; Coach picks a blue egg. That rounds out the tribes. Better news for the red tribe than the blue tribe. Ozzy may be one of the worst strategists in the history of the game, but he’ll be very useful at camp and in challenges.

Savaii (red): Dawn, Elyse, Jim, John, Keith, Mark, Ozzy, Semhar, Whitney
Upolu (blue): Albert, Brandon, Christine, Coach, Edna, Mikayla, Rick, Sophie, Stacy

The first challenge pits Coach against Ozzy. They’ll climb a 12 foot pole, grab a turtle, climb under a log, and solve a pyramid puzzle. Reward is taro (similar to potatoes) and flint. Obviously Ozzy takes the early lead in the climb, and he extends that lead in the climb. It’ll come down to the puzzle, though, and apparently neither of them was paying attention to the rules. Realizing they both suck at puzzles, they ask for advice. Boston Rob wouldn’t have needed help. Savaii wins reward.

Ozzy has decided that Semhar will be his partner in this. Hope that works out better for you than your alliance with Amanda did.

Christine says she’s going to look for firewood. It’s not lost on anybody this is code for going on a hunt for the hidden immunity idol.

Medical marijuana dispenser Jim pretends he’s a teacher.

Under Coach’s leadership, Upolu gets to work right away building their shelter. Ozzy’s suggestion: let’s go for a swim instead.

Unlike his uncle who sought out a pretty young girl to be his winggirl, Brandon does not feel comfortable around Mikayla.

5 people are sitting together on the first night. Coach suggests forming an alliance.

On the morning of day 2, Dawn’s breaking down already both physically and mentally. An easy first target.

Brandon’s goal is to be the provider. He catches the first fish, enough to feed a small child, but at least it’s a start.

The immunity challenge is an obstacle course through zigzag pathways and a web of coconuts and over a 10 foot wall. One tribe member will dig for a machete to chop ropes and release coconuts, which will then be used as basketballs. Upolu takes a bit of a lead. They perform better on the wall, but their lead is minimized on the digging. Semhar turns out to be useless at shooting, and Jim does not hide his disgust. In a close battle where the difference is just one coconut, Upolu wins immunity, fire, and a clue to the hidden immunity idol (the clue is hidden because it’s not like anybody needs clues to find the idols anyway).

They start looking for the clue right when they get back. Stacey thinks she could have stumbled right over it and not noticed. She would not be wrong in that belief.

On the other side, Semhar immediately goes off on Jim, telling him she did not like that he was making faces behind her back at the challenge. The immediate reaction is that she needs to go, but since Ozzy has decided he has a crush on her, which he might want to inform her of at some point, he defends her sticking around. His target instead is John, not the worst target, but not as logical a target as Semhar either. This is not smart, but what do you expect from Ozzy? His suspicious strong defense of her is not lost on Jim.

Votes
John
Semhar
Semhar
Semhar
Semhar
Semhar

With 5 votes, Semhar has been voted off the island. She makes her way to Redemption Island, angry that people lied to her about not getting rid of her. If you can’t handle lying this early, you don’t want to be around when it gets really vicious.

Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another live recap of Survivor: South Pacific Episode 2, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.

Last season, Rob and Russell returned. Though Russell was eliminated early, Boston Rob finally won the million dollars. Both are among the best players the game has ever seen, even if Russell is so unlikeable he could never win.

For Survivor: South Pacific, we get… Ozzy and Coach? Really? 22 seasons, and that’s the best you can do?

Oscar “Ozzy” Lusth made a good run in Survivor: Cook Islands before throwing the game away and losing to Yul. His second appearance in Survivor: Micronesia ended with a 9th place finish after he was outsmarted by an awesome group of women.

Benjamin “Coach” Wade never had a shot in either season. In Survivor: Tocantins, he placed 5th. His second attempt was less convincing, as he finished in 12th place as the first member of the jury in Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains.