American Idol’s back for another season. Whether that’s good or bad is subject to much debate, but here we go. Apparently, if it ain’t broke… fix it. The biggest change we’re seeing this year is the addition of a fourth judge, Kara DioGuardi, who apparently was nominated for a Grammy. Like she’s not there just in case one of the other judges needs to go to rehab on vaction for a while. Of course, alongside her will be Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, Randy Jackson, Ryan Seacrest, and an awful lot of people who can’t sing.
Seacrest tells us this is the biggest season ever (as usual). The first stop is Phoenix, Arizona, about 1/4 mile from the sun. They first met Jordin Sparks here.
Tuan Nguyen seems to think he’s from the 70s if his hair is any indication. For some reason he’s decided to incorporate drill team dancing with his singing. He wants to be as big as Michael Jackson and Britney Spears, who at some point in the past were indeed big. He sings The Way You Make Me Feel. I think we’ve spent enough time on him already.
Multi-colored haired Emily Hughes’ mom had to give up singing to be a mother, but Emily wants to pick up where her mom left off. She sings Barracuda by Heart. Simon likes her because she’s different. Paula says she’s probably in the top 5. She plans to ditch her band who can’t go on their European tour without her, but she plans to go the Daughtry route (uh, he dropped his original band).
Randy Madden hasn’t had any singing lessons. Since he’s crying before he gets in there, this should be dramatic. He sings Living on a Prayer by Bon Jovi. Simon says his singing is wimpy. He asks for them to give him a chance, then the waterworks start. Kara tells him he hasn’t worked hard enough to make it in the industry. Although he wouldn’t have made it very far, if for no other reason than he is indeed a drama queen, he sings better than many of the people they will let through.
J.B. Ahfua sings Wake Up and Dream and gets through to Hollywood. Simon suggests he loosen up a bit, though.
It’s pretty clear Michael Gurr should not be there before he even sings. As for his singing… what the bloody hell is this? Simon doesn’t know what language that was. So, of course, they let him sing another song.
Aundre Caraway already has a stupid nickname (X-Ray). He’s got his guitar with him and sings a song about a cactus. Whether this is an actual song or not, he’s not going through to Hollywood, and unlike Michael, they don’t want him to sing another song.
16-year-old Arianna Afsar founded Adopt a Grandfriend, which puts on a performance for seniors and keeps them company. She sings Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae. She should be able to get far.
Elijah Scarlett is 22 years old, he’s from Phoenix, AZ, and… he’s 22 years old. Let’s see if the Barry White voice works for him. He sings My First, My Last, My Everything. Simon’s lack of hope for this audition was spot on. Paula suggests he do voiceovers for movies with monsters in them.
Lea Marie Golde has far too much pink on, which fits quite well with her excessive perkiness. She says she’s a cross between Hilary Duff and Madonna. Whatever that is. She’s also Kara DioGuardi’s biggest (only) fan. She sings Every Time We Touch by Cascada. Doesn’t sound that bad, but she might want to stick to writing.
Stevie Wright got her name from Stevie Nicks. She sings At Last by Etta James. Simon wants her to be more selfish, but she’s definitely good enough to go to Hollywood. Kara says that’s her favorite so far, and Paula compares her to Kelly Clarkson.
Michael Sarver is a roughneck on an oil rig, apparently the fifth most dangerous job in the world. He’s hoping to make a difference for his wife and kids. He sings a Boyz II Men and does well. Randy appreciates it more when he’s closing his eyes, but he is a likeable guy with a good voice.
Katrina Darrell, the bikini girl who’s already gotten more than her share of attention, sings Vision of Love by Mariah Carey. Simon and Randy don’t hear a note she sings. Kara wants to turn it into a sing off. Katrina tells her she’s not any better. Kara suggests that she might have more success if she didn’t bother with the bathing suit next time. Before she auditioned, Katrina warned Ryan she was going to kiss him if she got through. So he hid. She found him anyway, though, and she manages to plant one on him.
Eric Thomas has an even dumber nickname than X-Ray. He calls himself Sexual Chocolate. He sings Stevie Wonder’s Ribbon in the Sky. They’re not impressed, but apparently his mom will buy him a car because he didn’t make it.
A perky Brianna Quijada sings Let’s Hear it for the Boy by Deniece Williams. Simon tells her that her personality got her in there. She follows this up with Killing Me Softly, but Simon’s not any happier with this performance. Despite that, he agrees with Paula and lets her through.
Deanna Brown finds some strangers to be her family during the audition process. She sings Otis Redding’s Sittin on the Dock of the Bay. Her unique voice stands out to the judges.
Cody Sheldon loves making horror films. Shocker. He sings Wonderful World by James Morrison. The judges are pleasantly surprised.
Alex Wagner-Trugman (what’s up with the hyphen?) taught himself to sing in a moldy closet. He’ll sing Baby Come to Me by James Ingram if Randy sings the chorus. This song worked until Randy joined him. Simon didn’t like the audition and calls Randy ridiculous. Paula and Kara put him through to Hollywood.
Scott Macintyre was born almost completely blind, which is a driving force behind him wanting to explore music. Having entered college at 14, he hasn’t let his disability hold him back. He sings And So It Goes by Billy Joel and easily gets through to Hollywood.
Stay tuned to dingoRUE for another recap of American Idol 8 episode 2, which airs Wednesday at 8/7c on Fox.